December 31, 2011
(10 years ago…these were my reflections..😅)
Sahaj Marg is indeed simple but not easy. Out of immense love and gratitude for the Master, I couldn’t help but surrender my life to Him. This meant handing over all the decisions of my life to Him, and being prepared to face bravely whatever it entailed, taking everything that came my way as divine blessings, and lessons to learn from. It sounded great to me that I was following these tenets. But when it came to applying them in real life, was I really taking them as “Divine Blessings”? Those were the Real testing times, which made me think and introspect, “How am I supposed to take it?”, “Why am I sad although I know that whatever these circumstances are all coming from Him, and that whatever I am doing is in accordance to what He expects?” Inspite of knowing the fact that I am doing what He wants me to do, I was not happy from within, and was not doing it with all my heart.
When I came across,“As inside, so outside” in one of Master’s talks on character formation,
While going through Master’s talks on character formation (as part of the preparation that we were asked to do prior to attending the seminar CREST, Kgp), I came across the line- character means ‘As inside so outside’. When I first read it I thought it did not apply to me as I am never the “hypocrite” kind of a person in any way. But yet there was something in it that was nagging me, that I thought I needed to work up on. After listening to a talk of Master on one of the Sundays I knew I needed to open my heart to others and overcome my inhibitions. I could feel that the preparation had started, and some ground work was being done within, before going to attend the seminar at CREST,Kgp.
The first day, our group was assigned the topic “Humility”, and we had to meditate, reflect, do some research on this topic, and give a presentation on the last day. The next morning’s meditation gave me the answer, so that I had my bit to contribute for this topic. It was an experience that I had on the first evening itself. I had an overwhelming feeling, when I was served the evening snacks and later dinner, by an elderly couple whom I’d already met before, but couldnt remember where. On further interaction with them on that day I found that I’d had them both serve me before as well at the Manapakkam canteen.
During the meditation I realized that it was a truly humbling experience, because I have now been used to cooking and serving everyone in the family and I felt a bit ashamed accepting their service as I thought I should be in their place instead. But when I reflected upon it, I realised that, ironically, I’d never had even a tinge of such a feeling when I’d had them serve me before at Manapakkam, for at that time I was yet to step into the married life! So it was only marriage and the family life that followed it, that had taught me a lesson in humility.
Love and sacrifice
Master always says that marriage is very important in Sahaj Marg, as it is only in the Grihastha life that one learns these two virtues of love and sacrifice. As for me, I realised that thinking or claiming that “I have sacrificed so and so for my family”, is not really sacrifice, it is ego. It can only be so if it happens unknowingly and naturally when we act as per the need of the hour without thinking about our self interest, when we accept everything naturally and let His Will prevail.